Saturday, March 22, 2014

Aftermath

It has been an extensive time since I’ve used this olden blog. I’ve had to clear the cobwebs, and dust the crevices from time’s accumulation of dust and neglect.

I’m incensed, so I felt I’d climb to the loft of this old room, and vent it out, like my indignation; airing it out, until the columns of dust and dirt are swept away.

What is the collateral damage born of a physician’s burn out? I can tell you some of what I know. The damage is far reaching. It’s the physician’s health, his/her livelihood, his/her family, his/her reputation, and the patients he/she cared for – left displaced with no where to turn. Finding themselves cast out; disavowed of any direction.

The establishment only knows to push and prod, insurance companies delayed and denied, paperwork protracted on, with a lintel of reports and requests. There was just an endless stream of demands, needs and wants from various portals. The system designed to crush the average man, and purview them beyond the functions achievable of mortal men. So…they crack.

I feel for these souls, depleted beyond their years. My anger lies with the management that becomes aware of these struggling individuals, and makes a lame attempt to “help” them; but instead thrusts them back in the trenches as soon as possible, with little to any truly helpful intervention. Those are the secrets they keep behind their meetings with HR and Employee Health. The burned out will become immersed in having to find their footing, and save their livelihoods for an ungrateful den of marauders, carefully hidden beneath tailored suits, and crisp white linens.

Now we all must start again; nothing familiar, safe or rewarding in the process. One is left trying to piece together a life from among the ruins, while the rest are left wondering where to turn. Not one person in the equation wins. Not one. Help needs to come sooner, and help needs to be real.

Friday, November 1, 2013

Dona Nobis Pacem


It's time for our blog blast for Peace! I joined a community of peaceful bloggers out here in blogdom about 6 yrs. ago now, I think. Every November we blog for peace. We fly our peace globes, and hope for people all around the world to join us with positive energy, and good will. We wish for peace in the world, and as we do, we quietly go about our lives hoping to be a force of good in the world. Just daily quiet warriors for peace.

Friday, August 23, 2013

They Won't Let Me Talk About Cancer

She sat at the kitchen table, eyes down, hands wrapped around her warm cup of tea. "Thank you for letting me talk about the cancer. My family, they ... they ... won't let me talk about cancer." I sat silent and shook my head in the affirmative.
My heart broke for her. She has been through so much. My dear, wonderful friend has battled stage 4 lung cancer for 20 some years. She is the longest living lung cancer patient in the world, I think. She told me once that her doctor told her this.

I understood the hurt she felt, and the desperate need to talk about what was happening to her. I also knew the anger she refused to let boil to the surface. I knew it well.

People just can't seem to handle talking about the illness, the treatments, the side effects. When they deny us venting, they put an added burden on the person battling the illness. Sometimes we need to talk about it. We need to share what we feel about it or what something was like. Others want to "cheer" us up, want us to move on from the subject. Well, that's not helpful when someone needs their loved ones support.

Does it take someone who has been seriously ill to understand? Why can't people just sit by you and listen? Why can't they summon the courage, that we have no choice in? Courageous they'll call us ... what choice did we have? The least they could do, is buckle up their big girl boots, and set there and be with you.

If you really, really want to help someone in crisis. Listen to them. If they want to talk about what's happening, don't shut them down, don't change the subject. Don't put your own needs before theirs at this point. Just listen. You don't have to solve it, you don't have to cure it (although that would be great.) You sometimes don't even have to say a word ...just listen. A warm hug, a soft blanket and a friend is so comforting. Be that friend.

Copyright © 2013 Chrysalis Angel
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Friday, August 16, 2013

They are green, too



Your Eyes Should Be Green


Your eyes reflect: Striking attractiveness and danger



People find you to be: Passionate, intense, and unpredictable



Your best trait: You can read people easily and understand their true motivations



What's hidden behind your eyes: A vivid inner world

Signs

How many times do you hear people say, "Please, give me a sign?" They want a sign to know which path to take, which guy to marry, which job to take. The thing is ... signs are all around us. We either pay attention to them or we don't.

When you are on a path you are meant to be, things will go smoothly and fall right into place. On the other hand, if you find you are blocked, and challenges keep getting in your way, it probably is a good idea to stop and think things over. Perhaps it isn't the right path for you. Perhaps it isn't the right timing. Sometimes, you or another person is not ready. Things that are meant to be, will be. They will always find a way to materialize.

I imagine many of you have had experiences where your gut was telling you one thing, but your mind was wanting to overlook or discount it. I've learned now, not to do this. I just came out of an experience that caused me a great deal of heartache, and it would have never happened had I paid attention to some things that were said to me before I ever accepted a position. Comments and body language I should have noted with more angst; they were clues to what kind of people I was dealing with. Oh well, I feel a reminder of that poor decision every single day. It reminds me to pay attention and choose differently. It has taught me many, many lessons. I'm less naive now, and sadly,
it has made me less trusting.

Just pay attention to things around you. We are watched over and I know if you pay attention, your signs could be as simple as a certain song that comes on the radio, or a literal sign as you pass by it, on your way to work. If it's really important you may keep hearing it over and over again. Something as simple as tire ads that remind you to get new tires. If something is repetitive pay attention.